Jun 05 13:28:48 106 PA
From Chronicles
Jun 05 13:28:48 106 PA
Coventry Place - Maya and Vixen's Apartment
There is ostensibly one benefit to having the ticked off ex move in with the friend you just added the same adjective to: it's more convenient for giving apologies and/or receiving beating. After consecutive conflicts, it seems Leonard may be (re)developing a masochistic streak. A few questions of the management, passed tenants, and potentially some exploratory knocking have allowed him to reach this door, though are not what brought him here. Three fresh knocks are rapped.
The door takes a while to open, but it finally does. Rock ballads are playing softly in the background and Maya stands there, strangely in her pajamas. Unlikely outfit at this time of day, even more unlikely when it has strawberries over white cotton. She doesn't step back to let him in, folding her arms across her chest, her chin lifting, her face bare of makeup. There may be a hint of pink in her eyes, but her face gives no quarter. "Vix isn't here."
Leonard begins to speak, then pauses a moment as Maya pre-empts him. A nod follows. "Would you inform her that I wish to speak to her?" Her outfit might draw a grin if her posture didn't tromp all over it, so his features remain mostly neutral. After the silence of the long moment of observation, he adds, "I didn't mean to upset you, Maya. Whether I misspoke or you misinterpereted, that was not what I wanted."
Maya nods slowly at his request, her hand moving to the edge of the door as if to close it. His next comment tightens her lips and she shakes her head slowly. Before she speaks, she moistens her lips, the gesture nervous. "Is that an apology, Leonard? I don't ...You've changed. I'm not sure that..." She shakes her head again, lifting a hand to push her hair from her face. "I don't know if I can be friends with someone who hits on me and blames it on me being affectionate."
"That isn't what I intended to imply," Leonard exhales a sigh, "and, yes, it is an apology." His hands are now within his pockets as he stands in the hall before her door. "I wasn't blaming you."
Vixen comes along home slowly. Her eyes dipped, brow furrowed with thought. Puzzling through the mysteries with intent and focus. Though she's distracted by an unexpected set of voices at the door, still a bit off when she look up to find the man there. Her breath catches and she pauses. Quietly. Frozen for a moment before she starts to move forward again. Sure to be noticed eventually, observing the two(even if Maya isn't too visible from outside) with a mixed expression.
Maya doesn't notice Vixen initially, staring up at the man, her grin missing, her face set in tight lines. "Yes you were. You said my hugs and things made you think it was alright to make a pass. So you don't get a hug from me." Her fingers tighten on the door's side, her chin lifting as she moves to push it closed, the movement bringing Vixen into her view. "Vixen!" A look at Leonard, almost guilt in her face.
Leonard's relatively flat expression begins to dip, "No, Maya, I didn't..." His words trail off at the pending closure, and then there is the woman. He shifts to Vixen, the sagging mood spiking upwords and bobbing around neutral again. ""Hello again, Vixen."
Vixen's eyes shift towards the doorway as Maya marks her presence. But her attention moves back towards Leo quickly. Her forward momentum continuing. "Hi Leo." Her tone careful. Her approach slowly to a pause with perhaps ten feet separating the two. She's quiet for a, for her, awkward moment before she motions. "I didn't mean to interrupt." Motioning towards Maya, who she looks to and gives a soft little smile. Brief, but not false.
"There is nothing to interrupt." Maya's tone is flat, her arms moving to cross her waist, almost hugging herself. "Leonard came to find you. You are here, and I can go back to bed." She returns Vixen's smile with a flicker of a smile, not false but barely there. She takes a step back, intending to leave them alone.
"Actually, I was here looking for ...you." Leonard is quick to correct. Not quite quick enough, but he finishes the, now redundant, clarification, regardless. "I was hoping to talk, and more pleasantly, if possible."
Vixen blinks once when Maya clarifies Leo's reason for being here and she looks back to him again. She seems to hold herself in reserve as he confirms. Looking towards Maya then. "We can.. inside. I promise we'll not make a lot of noise," Half meant for Leo, though she keeps her eyes on Maya for the while thing, up to the last that is meant for her.
Maya hesitates, returning her look to Leonard, a wariness in it that wasn't there before. "I don't think there is anything to say to me, and I don't have anything to say to you." She replies, turning and leaving them at the door, padding away barefoot. She leaves the door open, her back towards them, as she heads towards the couch.
Leonard nods to Vixen in confimation. "We won't." He turns to include Maya in that, but she's already turned to walk inside. After a pause and another glance to Vixen, he steps in, himself.
Vixen steps in herself after Leo, her own expression careful. She turns as she enters, pushing the door closed quietly in her wake. Back turned towards the both of them as she starts to divest herself of her coat. The boots will follow soon after. The act done with a lingering slowness.
Maya has curled up on the corner of the couch, and is working hard to ignore them both, a pillow hugged to her. She has a book resting on her knees, her head bent over it. The stiffness in her neck and shoulders is obvious and she turns a page as she hears Vixen removing her things.
Everyone is 'getting comfortable', save Leonard, even if no one is actually at ease. His outerwear and shoes stay on as he looks from one to the other. Not furtive, but his gaze seems hesitant to just loiter on any one for too long. He inhales audibly before breaking the silence with earnest, yet carefully paced words. "First, I /am/ sorry, Maya. Your affectionate nature is not what I referred to, before, but I'm sorry all the same." With no real segue, his focus shifts to the other woman in the room. "I don't expect things will be like they were, but I don't want you ...gone. I can't have you gone."
Vixen glances up, just before pulling off her other boot. Which she does after his words to her. Her expression still a bit careful. But she moves a little closer to both as she responds to Leo, "I don't want them to be like they were.. recently. I.. want.." She pauses, arresting her instinctive path to take another. "I want to understand you, Leo. I want to get in your head, cause I thought I did know you.. but I don't.. not really. Maybe when I understand.." But she pauses, no real ending yet coming to mind for her.
Maya puts the book down, carefully marking a place before she sets it aside. She gives Leonard a cool nod, rising to her feet and turning to Vixen. "I'll be in my room." With that, she turns, walking away from the scene between the pair.
Leonard's attention shifts briefly to Maya as she rises, returns her nod and then turns back to Vixen. He appears to welcome her departure, if not the nature of it, and the removal of the feeling he is caught between two women. Again. "I can't make you understand, but I can do more to help you try. What do you want to know, Vix? I've always been honest with you."
"A lot of things.." Vixen stands awkwardly for a few moments before she abruptly moves towards the couch. A motion towards it is her only invitation as she passes Leo, curling herself into one corner of it, waiting until she has settled herself to say more. "I guess.. what I really want to understand is what I am to you.. what I mean.. when you look at me."
"Never an easy question..." Leonard doesn't quite smile, but the flat remark as he moves to sit at the opposite end is not sarcastic in the slightest either. He regards her as he considers a moment before replying. "I see alot of things, Vix. You're more a part of my life than anyone else, my first experience of damn near everything, good and not so much. I could nearly define my entire life by you, around you. It was incredible... and it scared the shit out of me."
Vixen doesn't yet seem quite sure how to take Leo's words. Though she is thoughtful. Mulling each word. "I wanted to help you, Leo.. I still do. That's really all I've ever wanted. Well, not all, but its always been there. You were so sweet when we first met. It was nice.. but because I didn't want to just.. roll all over you I tried keeping it simple."
Leonard sinks further into the couch, more slouch than relaxation. "And I was giddy, wanted to please you, and had no idea what I was doing. Some of that hasn't changed, still." A slender smile begins to grow with the reminiscence. "When you wanted to keep things simple, I felt set up, or used, somehow, and pushed for more. You could have rolled over me with dragon and I would've welcomed it..."
"And now.." Vixen's expression grows a bit stormy. "You say you want to please me.. you gotta know you ain't, Leo. You know how things are with me now. I probably said it all too many times.. still don't believe I made such a fool of myself at the deli." Her eyes dip slightly. "But what about you? You didn't seem.. happy. At the deli." Her eyes lift again and she chases that with, "Are you happy, Leo? You got what you want.. to just be able to.. do things. RIght?"
"I'm not, Vix," Leonard's lips purse, relieving him of the smile, "but I don't want to beg, or plead, or whine, and that just leaves wounded and angry. Sure, I can do what I want, so long as I don't want anyone around to do it with. It seemed just a trade off, at first. You weren't truly mad, Ema was content, and even Tirzah was respectful. You even told me what I felt was just missing what I was accustomed too, a habit. I don't think that's true."
"I was mad.. still am a bit. ." Vixen pauses and tries to resolve feelings into words. She seeks a few moments before she murmurs, "It's hard to feel close to you like I want when it feels like you ain't so close to me. When you're with other girls. LIke.. there's something I can't give you when I want to give you everything you need." She pauses, considering a moment before she adds, "What is true in you, then? You know me, Leo. I'm all about truth. I'm looking for the truth in you right now. Even if it ain't what I want to hear. The truth hurts sometimes, I know that."
Thoughtful silence and pregnant pauses. They agree on those, at least. "There wasn't anything you weren't giving, Vix. I just wanted something I took on my own, did for myself. Maybe it doesn't make any sense..." Leonard has no easier time with words, and his record of intent versus result prompt him to take extra care.
"Making me feel how you did is something you did. It wasn't.. some stupid spell or someone else doing it. That was you. How you treated me when we first met. Being nice and warm and how you looked at me. Just.. took a little jolt for me to realize it." She glance a little to the side. "That's why I hung on to you when part of me was saying to let you go. Why I went to that stupid strip club with you. And why I tried being nicer to Ema, trying to not mess up your friendship with her after I guess I already did." She shakes her head a little. "But when you did that spell.." She looks at him. "Maybe it was minor, but it wasn't the spell.. it was that you'd cut a corner like that.. maybe we were being crazy then, but that's a time for you to take control.. to do like you did with me at the Alibi when I got snippy with Maya. You did perfect then. That was the kind of Leo I was hoping for. Strong and firm."
"It was a shortcut, and it was wrong," Leonard's is the gaze that averts, now, "but I thought I would need choose between you two, and I refused to. Ema was a large part of everything, too. Maybe more than I wanted to admit. Lately, she's been the only one who seemed to understand, but she's not one for nice or warm, either. Maybe I'm the one going crazy.
"She doesn't love you. I.. I was.. close, like I said," Vixen murmurs softly. "I don't doubt she likes you, but she doesn't love you.. and no matter what you might think from Maya, friends don't have to sleep together. You're not crazy, just.. young. LIke I was once. Still am I guess, I've just been through a bit more of the shit already. I know that some things are more precious than physical pleasure.. things that you don't find everyday. Things that last longer."
A smirk curls Leonard's lips, but is not directed a her. "I know she doesn't, Vix, and I don't expect her to. It's a mutually selfish relationship, if it can be called that. Nothing... real." His eyes finally shift back across the couch to her. "You're right, and there are things more important. The rest is just easier, and tempting in many ways. I have my own vindictive side, like you mentioned in the deli, but it's larger than that."
"Then tell me, Leo.. " Vixen shifts herself, straightening slowly. "What is it? Something that.." She has many guesses, yet she holds them back, shaking her head a little. "Despite it all I still want to be with you Leo. If I didn't, you wouldn't be sitting here. I wouldn't.. I wouldn't care what you were doing. I wouldn't feel like I have. I know that's real."
"I was ...nothing, Vix, for a very long time." Leonard's voice is equally small, and his feet lift to the couch. Knees are tucked under his chin and arms wrap about his shins. "Then I was given the chance to be something. Something more than most. I don't know what, and I still don't, but I want to do /something./" He falls quiet again for a long moment. "I want you, need you, but there's a part of me that frightens you, and sometimes myself. What would you do if you could do most anything you wanted with a wave of your hand? You call it wrong, but should I? Would you still if you could the same?" Maybe he is going crazy, afterall.
"I don't know, Leo.. I was thinking about something like that recently," Vixen admits. "I'm a little fish. Normal with people all around that can do things with a wave of hand or a thought." Her eyes linger on him as she speaks. "I wondered.. what would I do if I had powers like that.. and I really don't know. I think I'd like it.. maybe. BUt would I do bad things? Or good things?" She shakes her head. "I dunno, but doing something.. you are. I wouldn't have gotten as far as I did to help the refugees with you and your magic. Maybe it isn't so grand as some things, but it is doing something. Making a difference. Wrong.. wrong is something we all decide. Maybe I don't know all the right and wrong times, but that one time.. every bit of me says it was wrong. And you gotta know that's real cause you know how I feel about Ema. I talked with her.. I think we're ok, but I still don't trust her. But there are some things you just don't do unless you're protecting a life or something like that."
Leonard turns his head sideway on his knees to watch her. "I want to be strong, firm, for myself and you. A big fish... but they /eat/ the little ones, Vix. Somebody handed me a giant can and I can tag the whole world on whim if I wanted to. Ema's like that, and it doesn't bother her. I envy that, but it's all the more reason not to trust her." A sigh and a shake of his head. "I'm babbling again, aren't I? Back to pathetic, already."
"This isn't pathetic, Leo," Vixen asserts, shifting herself from leaned into the corner to resting on her knees, a hand on the back of the couch. "Being strong don't mean you have to eat others. Being big don't mean that. I.." She pauses, uncertainty touching her. "Well, I met this guy. A while ago, really. He's a big fish. Got these.. tattoos that do magic things. But he's.. very nice. Something of a goody goody. He's all over helping the refugees.. lives in a tiny little place in the Cheapo when he could probably be living high in a better place than that, making creds off merc work or something." She shakes her head a little. "You don't gotta be mean to be big and strong. Takes more strength to be good. Really being strong is learning how to use what you got the right way."
A brow arches, some sign of fresh life showing on Leonard's face. "A very nice guy? I'm jealous." There might even be a pinch of humor in that. "I thought they always finished last, but those might not be my thoughts. Hard to tell, anymore, with so many extra floating around in my head."
"That's how it always is, Leo.. the best ones listen to everyone and then decide for themselves," Vixen murmurs. "I try, but I don't always succeed." She then shakes her head. "You don't have to be jealous. I'm not out looking for guys. He is very nice.. but he doesn't make me feel the way you did.. you still do." She remains poised, eyes on him. "But.. I guess I wonder where this leaves us. You know what I want. Maybe I've told you too much. Being selfish.. but what about you?"
Leonard's head lifts from his knees, gaze remaining on her. "Nothing's changed in how I feel about you, Vix, just how I feel about myself. I want to be that guy for you..." He hesitates a moment before continuing, "but I don't know, anymore, if I can. As much as I want to try, I don't want to screw things up any more, either."
"Can you give me that one thing I ask of you?" Vixen watches him closely as she asks this. "That's the only thing I truly want from you.. my selfish little desire." She inches closer to him. "Can you do that? If you could.. maybe we could work the rest out?"
"You don't have to share me, Vix, you never did. I know I looked, even drooled..." Leonard pauses as he's not especially helping himself, "It was new, different, but not better. I'm not even sure what came after was even about sex, and it wasn't anything more than that."
"What about Ema?" Vixen touches upon the subject ever so gently. "I meant what I said.. I don't mind if you're friends with her. But.." She pauses, then adds, "I understand she likes you.. but there are lots of other guys in the city. Maybe she can find someone that will love her. Or at least someone else to get whatever it is she needs." Her shoulders roll a little.
A smirk arises to curl Leonard's lips. "Now that I know what she's actually after, I can work something out. It's more about power than pleasure with her." His shoulders now roll. "I wonder if I should've just let her go, before."
"I don't know, Leo," Vixen replies softly. "I think that's for you to decide cause she's you're friend. I don't want to force nothing. Though I suppose I already am in a way." She pauses, wavering on the edge of something for a moment before she leans forward. Hands touch the cushions, but only for a moment as she eases up to him. There's little preamble then as she slips in against him, wrapping her arms around his waist, her cheek laid against his chest. Breathing out softly, she murmurs lowly, "I have to talk to Maya.. I.." She looks up towards him. "I'll give you time, for now. To do what you gotta. To decide on things."
An arm slides about her waist comfortably, easily and his head shakes as he looks down to her. "Maybe it's better that you do force things, sometimes, but you're not, now. I have no idea what I want to do with myself, Vix, but I know I want you to be a part of it. If that means you need to beat me down for my own good, do so. There's no doubt I've already earned that a few times over."
"That's the point Leo.. I don't want to beat you down. I want to lift you up." Vixen looks up to him. "I want to tell you when I'm worried and tell you when I think you're doing wrong. But I want you to tell me too, like you did. And I want to do things with you." Her eyes linger up towards his, "Maybe it will take some time.. but maybe we can get back to where we were. I hope so, cause I liked it. I miss it a lot." Her head dips again and she relaxes just a bit with a deep breath taken and released.
"Good. It would be safer with you building my pedestal." A notable smile finally finds Leonard's face. "All this time you thought you were going to be the one to fall off, and you wound up catching me, instead." His other arm wraps about to simply hold her. "I miss it, too, Vix."
"Stay a little while, Leo. Like this." Murmured lowly as she burrows in beside him, her arms tightening for a moment before she relaxes again. Eyes closed, simply soaking in his presence quietly after those words. How long 'a little while' might be is questionable, but she won't be in a rush to usher him out. Letting the moment last naturally. Perhaps the whole night, as the likelihood of sleep is near for her.
Leonard lowers his head to hers, simply for the added contact. "Yes, dear." Connotations aside, it is soft, earnest, and appropriate. He's not going anywhere until booted out the door.
